Then I became aware that my cock was being swallowed by a very knowledgeable cocksucker. I could see Louisa's face so I knew it had to be her husband,...Mike. After a few minutes he moved around to the other side of the bed and started feeding his cock to his wife. I continued fucking her with my mouth and tongue as I watched his cock gliding in and out of her mouth. She had such an angelic expression on her face -- like she was in pure heaven, and suddenly, I got an inexplicable urge to join. There is a very fine line between pain and pleasure, I had always understood that, but Cindy loved to cross that line every time we got together and my experiments with her had awakened a deep desire in myself and after several months of work, my desires could be acted upon. It was unfortunate that Cindy had to move cross-country, she would have enjoyed all of my efforts, but now, I would just have to find someone else to try them out on. I began making nightly trips to the bars and hangouts. After an hour or so a rented dee-jay started spinning records for dancing. Old stuff from the 50s and some newer stuff too. Inevitably I started dancing with Amaka - I don't believe we had ever danced during our school days and was pleased at how good she felt in my arms and how good she smelled. As the evening wore on we both danced with other people but came back to each other. As dance led to dance we danced closer together and I soon developed a woody. I pulled her even closer to me, slowly. But I felt that I would rather die than allowthe secret to be discovered. I felt ashamed by my "perversion." Why doI have to be like this? Why can not I be like all the other boys? Lifeis so much easier for them! The place and time I was born did not offerany acceptance for trans people. And the hormone therapy was out of thequestion. I think it is still highly problematic in Russia, but it wassimply impossible at that time. Therefore I was trapped in my body andwas afraid to even talk to.
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