She shook her head. “Hate anything Italian. Have done since World War Two. Good job they strung up Mussolini from a lamp post, that’s all I can sa...,” she barked. Never before had I heard such a virulent condemnation of cooking with pasta. I was about to beat a hasty retreat when she added: “I’ve got a home-made cottage pie you can have. But its tofu, not beef.”“Thank you. That would be wonderful.” Supper sorted, I accepted my neighbour’s invitation to share a drink in her kitchen, ‘A drink’. “Even in England, men are jerks,” Michelle finally blurted out, blowing her nose into an overused tissue. Michelle went on to recount the particularly disastrous date she experienced earlier that evening. She had finally been asked out, since coming to England, by one of the cuter farmer’s sons. When they got to the pub, she figured out it was just one of the local boys showing her off like a trophy, as the one to take out the American girl staying at the old Wellington place. At first this. "I must say, your bullshit does fit your schlong sizes; you think you can get away with shit and not do your schoolwork. That's not the case; you two decided to state the obvious, you fucking cocky sons of bitches. Dare I ask, do either of you have any smart-ass comments now? I mean, does anything come to mind?" I asked, before a gap. "No, I got you in a corner, and you have nothing."I kept glancing at both of them for a moment as neither of them could get a word out, and my hands continued to. The fire alarm sounded insistently, and as they joined the flight from the building, they could see the choking white smoke pouring into the hallways. The duo laughed until they hurt as they stood outside waiting for the fire trucks and the all clear.They hadn't laughed so heartily when they were summoned to Principal Nelson's office. He'd seen their amusement at the spectacle, and obviously suspected them; after all, they had both been involved in a great many prior pranks. They got the.
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